It appears to be human nature for us to want to find a reason, cause, or another person to blame for something that has happened to us or to a loved one. Think of how easy it is for us to throw blame around when we are caught practically red-handed in an act. How did we learn this?
The blame game has been with us since our earliest days of childhood. As a child, we tried the excuse that someone else made me do it to see if that excuse would work. Depending on your childhood it had varying success, yet any time that it worked we learned that blaming was a viable excuse. As we've grown into adulthood many of us continue to use this excuse.
Many of my clients want to find who is to blame for the way they are today. They are convinced that if…Write comment (1 Comment)
So, for our purposes, I describe happiness as “our level of satisfaction with what we have at the moment”. Now, when we say, “with what we have,” that could be our material goods, job, career, relationships, or anything else. So, taken in the context of my definition of happiness, are you happy?
This may sound strange, but I promote that happiness is not a goal to strive toward. Why would I stay away from a goal of happiness? Well, the reason that I say this is that we tend to look at happiness as “Am I satisfied with what I have right now?”
The problem with that question is that the answer changes over time. I might, as a child, be satisfied in life playing with a cardboard box. But, all that changes when I become a teenager and young adult, as that box may no longer make me happy. As I advance through adulthood, the whole notion of happiness changes again.Write comment (1 Comment)
This time of the year is when I reflect upon my own childhood memories; memories filled with awe and wonder as the world seemed to be magical. Unfortunately, this time of the year is also one of increased holiday stress due to all the activities we feel we need to do. Our wish to make this time of the year "perfect" increases our expectations, many of them unreasonable, causing us to overwork in our planning efforts.
As a child, I fondly recall watching the animated Christmas specials and reading all the Christmas books I could find. Those stories not only have positive endings, but most of them also depict perfection. In these stories families gather and get along with each other, the house is majestically decorated, the dining room table set to rival the fanciest restaurant. My…
It's usually not the big things that affect us as much as the accumulation of these daily small annoyances. We find ourselves lashing out in anger or snapping at others for what they may feel is a small matter, but you are really lashing out not over that issue specifically, rather you are reacting to an accumulation of small issues.
When my clients complain about issues in their life, regardless of my opinion, I try to refrain from labeling it “the small stuff”. If something is bothering someone I don't want to say “small stuff” as that negates what they're feeling. Although, I hope to get them to a point when someday in the future they can recognize the current issue was something small and can be now laughed at.
To get to that point of laughing at ourselves over the small stuff one of the questions that I'll ask my clients is, “in the scope of everything going on in your life and in the world right now, where does this fit?”…Write comment (0 Comments)
You’ll learn that many of the topics which I write about have their origins in my life’s experiences. I don’t write from theory, I write from my own struggles and self-learning.
Finding inner peace is possible because I have found my inner peace. Read along and you’ll understand the evolution of my thought and insights. You too can find your inner peace, and I feel honored guiding you to that peace.
Jan Bowen: Well, as you may or may not know, on this show I talk about how people found their purpose, and how they live the life that they do. With you, it's so intriguing to me because the name of your website is exactly what I want to talk about. The website that Chris has is lifesjourneyblog.com. Chris, what was your life journey to the point that you are…Write comment (0 Comments)