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As the new year began, many of us made resolutions for ourselves with healthy living intentions. We resolved to make our life better, to be healthier, to be successful, and overall to be different from who we've been. But now, as the year progresses, we lament that many resolutions are less accomplished than we hoped. Some we still need to start (or started yet now ended). What happened? What went wrong? Let me show you how to make a resolution that will last.
“Plans are only good intentions unless they immediately degenerate into hard work.” - Peter Drucker
As the Drucker quote states, our plans will not be successful, and we will only reach our goals if they entail hard work. If we make resolutions that are too easy to accomplish, we either put them off for later or don't fulfill us enough to continue with the task. If I may, I would like to expand on Drucker's quote to include "plans which challenge and inspire us" we are more likely to stick with doing. The idea of hard work is essential, but so are tasks that challenge and inspire.
Often, it's easier for us to adhere…
Read more: new years resolution: you're doing them all wrong and here's why
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Pain management, typically utilized for those suffering from chronic pain issues, is popular for those choosing not to use narcotics for pain relief. According to a recent study mindfulness, a practice I speak of often has now been scientifically proven to help those suffering from chronic pain. As I’ve previously shared, I too suffer from chronic pain and so know how well mindfulness works for me, and how well it works for my clients.
Pain management, when coupled with mindfulness, does not take away the pain, but the focus is on learning how best, healthily, to cope with the pain. Mindfulness does not ignore the miseries of life, it allows us to embrace the pain, recognize the pain, and then deal with the pain. A goal of mindfulness is to more fully understand all aspects of life, the good, bad, or otherwise.
The definition of mindfulness that I use is the standard definition touted by the scholar Jon Kabat-Zinn: “a means of paying attention in a particular way; on purpose, in the present moment, and nonjudgmentally.” In this definition, there is no mention of focusing only on the positives in life, but to pay attention to the present moment.…
Read more: Pain Management: How To Use Mindfulness To Find Peace
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Learning to not sweat the small stuff is a phrase filled with much wisdom. The important piece to this statement is learning to live in the moment. But how can we learn to stay more in the moment so that we don't let the little things bother us so much that we lose our happiness? Here is my technique on how to not sweat the small stuff.
Step one is to actually reframe the question of how not to sweat the small stuff. If something is bothering someone, then it's not "small stuff" to them. Judging another's perception as to the gravity of a situation negates what they're feeling and expressing. Although, I do hope to eventually get them to a point in the future where they can laugh at it and say, ah, that really was small.
But, to not sweat the small stuff, to get to the point of recognizing the smallness of some of our concerns, the question I'll ask the client is "in the scope of everything going on in your life and in the world today, where does this issue fit?" If they're honest with themselves and with me, they'll understand the inner challenge…
Read more: How To Not Sweat The Small Stuff And Find Happiness
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Selfishness is overwhelmingly the norm of our culture. Yet at the same time, self-help practitioners and life coaches are promoting practices such as mindfulness and self-awareness into an age of selfishness, enabling that selfishness to become the emerging goal of mindfulness. I fear that maybe my mission of life coaching is partly to blame for this selfishness, even though my approach to life coaching is very different from most coaches.
As a life coach, speaker, and author on the topic of finding inner peace through mindfulness, I fear that maybe my life’s mission is to blame for this selfishness. Have I been leading people astray? Actually, no!
A close examination of my material and mindfulness itself eschews selfishness in all of its manifestations. So why the existential angst that I’m feeling? Our culture encourages individuality, no pain, no suffering, only encouragement, praise, and a “way to go” for every action performed. Individualism based on the absence of hardship inevitably leads one to believe themselves as the center of the world. For most people, the focus is on self, and on being happy.
Insert the practice of mindfulness and the various claims from life and wellness coaches that they will…
Read more: Selfishness Is NOT Mindfulness: My Approach To Life Coaching
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If I were to ask you “what ultimately do you want from life?”, many of you would answer “to be happy”; “to have money”; “to have success”; etc. We seek answers from life, while our culture answers with “get more stuff and gain fame then you will feel happy”. Will this suffice as your answer to your life question? Is that really what you want, or is there something else, something deeper for which you long?
During my time as a counselor I have worked with clients from every socio-economic status. Regardless of money or available material resources, everyone was seeking a common answer, namely, how to get a deep feeling of peace. As a result of their life struggles they came to realize that material goods and wealth is fleeting and can be lost. Therefore, they could no longer find satisfaction in material goods.
What makes me different from other life coaches is that I'm not promising you your dreams. I work in leading you to find inner peace, resulting in a self love expressed in action. My goal is not to make you successful, rich, or famous. I don't care if you succeed or fail in aspects…
Read more: 5 Reasons Why Mindfulness Matters
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© Christopher Shea and Lifesjourney, 2015- present. The unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from Christopher Shea is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Christopher Shea and Lifesjourney with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.